The time has come, as a certain walrus once said. I am clearing out my closet (as a certain rapper once said). Today at the very least I aim to list five very beautiful pairs of boots on eBay. Looking at them lined up in a sad little row, I feel bad. They’re beautiful and I want to keep them but they’re just TOO DAMN SMALL.

My main problem is that I started buying beautiful shoes when I was about 14. It’s only recently that I finally acknowledged that my feet are in fact at least a size bigger than that now. So it’s out with them.

Here’s what I’m selling:

Classic black Dr Martens: Size 4. Literally worn once and CANNOT find the time to wear them in.

Tan Old West cowboy boots: Size 4. These are SO nice but I’m very picky about heel shape with cowboy boots.

Hollywould purple snakeskin boots: Size 3/4. These cost something ludicrous like £240 new and I wore them once…

Moda in Pelle brown leather knee boots: Size 3. Oh they’re so lovely. Unfortunately my legs are a liiiittle too fat now. Cry.

Kurt Geiger purple bow boots: Size 4. This is breaking my heart. I wanted these boots SO MUCH but again, wore them once and they are now too small.

Be ready, there will be several listings today which I will update on later. Go check them out if you’re interested…that’s if I don’t change my mind!